January 2023: Let's Try This Again.

 

January 2023

    As a part of my New Year's resolutions for 2023, I wanted to get back into blogging. It used to be such a balm for my soul, a tried and true way for me to process emotions and difficult moments of my life. I find the practice of blogging to be a therapeutic exercise, and I haven't done it since December 2018. 

That's 4 years ago! Literally SO MUCH has happened in my life and I cannot believe I haven't written about any of it. 

I finished my first year of teaching at Bryan, I started dating Austin, I started my MFA program at Mississippi University for Women, I went through the pandemic and experienced teaching online, I got engaged, I acted onstage again, I got MARRIED, I went through two summers of MFA residencies, and I was promoted to Assistant Professor of Theatre. I celebrated my first wedding anniversary and saw my best friend get married. 

I have experienced so much and there's nothing on this blog to show for it. So many memories that will never be included in here. 

But that's okay. Life has been crazy and maybe I don't need to blog as much to process my feelings. I have a wonderful husband to be my listening ear and I'm older. I know how to process things on my own a bit better. 

Nevertheless, we're here. And it's a new year, and a new chance to reflect on each month that 2023 brings me.

***

This month was...interesting. I had developed a kidney infection right before Christmas, and I was still struggling with the remnants of that pain and irritation. Austin and I spent New Years in Huntsville, Alabama as a way to celebrate our anniversary early, and we traveled back home on January 1. Neither of us felt ready to tackle a new semester, and we wanted to linger in "break mode" for as long as we could. 

But January 2, our 2nd anniversary, saw Austin back at work and me at home, procrastinating from prepping for school. It seemed like real life was bursting in whether we were ready or not. 

As I recovered from my kidney infection, I started to show signs of a sinus infection. It progressively got worse but I pushed through as my own classes began January 10. However...when it got to the point that I couldn't even blow my nose without pain, I went to the doctor....and found out I had COVID. For the first time ever.

I was SO mad. I had managed to avoid it for so long, including Austin having it twice. I don't even know how I got it! The doctor warned me it was one of the most severe strains, and to prepare for it to be awful. I was forced to record all of my lectures and stay at home for a week. 

Here's the thing: I felt terrible, but it was SO nice to be stuck at home. It made going back to work even harder! But hopefully I'll never have to go through that again. 

Austin and I searched for ways to create joyful, meaningful moments in the midst of the grind that is January. We tried making a King Cake (major failure). 

We gave each other "cotton" anniversary gifts (He gave me a weighted blanket, I gave him a fuzzy robe). 

We had a game night with some of our best friends.  

We spent a lot of time watching Master Chef (my weird new-found obsession). 

I also had some highlights at work this month. 

I had auditions for our spring production, The Murder Room, and am very excited about the cast we have. 

I have been able to support and observe my senior major as she works on her senior production project, a one-act adaptation of The Great Divorce, which opens in February. 

But most importantly, I had several really wonderful conversations with my work study students. 

I've been struggling to feel like I have students this year who I can connect with in a meaningful way, and am still grieving the loss of the seniors who graduated and meant so much to me on a personal level. 

But over the last few weeks, I have been able to see that these students are eager to learn, longing to know me better, and want to be the reliable backbone of the department I so desperately need. I'm very thankful. 

Another high point of January was Austin taking me on a surprise date to Hennen's, the five-star restaurant in Chattanooga that we went to the night he proposed. 

It was an early Valentine's Day outing, since I have rehearsal on the actual day. We had a great time, and I had a fantastic filet mignon! 

A very sweet revisit to a special place for both of us. 

I don't really have a lot more to say about this month. 

January is always hard for me; getting back into the swing of things and recovering from having a long break is difficult, and it usually takes me about a month to accept that this new schedule is the "norm," at least until May. 

The next few months are going to be crazy, and I'm not sure I'm ready for it.