Week #8: Making the Best of It.

My 2016

Week #8

Making the Best of It.

I've reached the end of Winter Quarter (Thank GOD). This quarter feels like it has gone on forever and ever, but after tomorrow I will be completely done. So, as I reflect over this past week, I'm filled with gratitude for everything I've learned...but I'm also beyond happy to see this quarter go far, far away. 

Monday consisted of an interview for my Graduate Directing class, during which our professor was selecting the future Director of our Graduate Showcase next quarter.

Tuesday involved leading a workshop at a local high school drama club with two of my friends.

Wednesday was Boards (Once a year, you go through an evaluation process with the faculty. You present something you've worked on in your area of emphasis, and the faculty talk to you about how you've grown and what you can improve upon). It was slightly unnerving because I had absolutely no idea what to expect, but overall it went very well, and I left the room feeling encouraged and confident.

Thursday I had a conversation with one of the voice professors at Tech, and he ended up telling me that he wants to find more ways to have me involved in the music department as an accompanist. Whether or not that will actually happen is up in the air, but nevertheless, it was so nice to be reaffirmed in my musical abilities. I miss being involved in music so much, and am hoping that I will have more opportunities to play while I'm here.

On Thursday evening I found out that I had indeed been selected as the Director for our graduate showcase. My initial reaction was shock, then elation, then an overwhelming feeling of stress...but I'm just so excited, the stress quickly dissipated. Directing is such a huge part of what I want to do in my life, and having this opportunity to actually lead a cast and create something wonderful makes my heart so happy. It's going to be a stretching experience, but I know I will come out on the other side so much more confident and capable. 

Finally, Friday was my dear friend Millie's birthday, and the department threw her a surprise party. It was so much fun to laugh and joke around with the people I see everyday, and to see the pure joy on Millie's face when she realized how many people here love her. 

It was a good week.

***

This morning, I was scrolling through my TimeHop, and a quote I posted a few years ago showed up. As I was reading it, I found that it applies perfectly to what I've experienced lately here at Tech.

"For what it's worth...it's never too late, or in my case too early, to be whoever you want to be. There's no time limit. Start whenever you want. You can change or stay the same. There are no rules to this thing. We can make the best or worst of it. I hope you make the best of it. I hope you see things that startle you. I hope you feel things you never felt before. I hope you meet people who have a different point of view. I hope you live a life you're proud of, and if you're not, I hope you have the courage to start all over again."

-F. Scott Fitzgerald

I am making the best of it. 

I am going 100% for what I want out of life. 

I am meeting people who see things differently. 

I am living a life I'm proud of.

So here's to a brand new week, my readers. 

May you take Fitzgerald's advice and live life to the fullest. 

It's so worth it.

Week #7: A Letter From A Recently Converted Introvert.

My 2016

Week #7

A Letter From A Recently Converted Introvert.

Dear World,

Since I've arrived at Tech, a certain aspect of my personality has drastically changed. Well, to be honest, it's been slowly developing over the past 2 years or so, but I've noticed it more in the time I've been in grad school. 

World: I'm becoming an introvert.

*gasp*

And I finally admitted it to myself this past week.

Those of you who knew me before now are probably shocked. I was one of the biggest extroverts in college; always making plans and forming groups and sending out Facebook party invitations. I loved being with people, and you would rarely find me alone...ever.

But now, it's almost nearly the opposite. At the end of the day I cannot wait to come home and be by myself. I don't really have a desire to go out every night and stay up late with people, being exhausted and energy deprived. Whether that's because I'm getting older or because of my surroundings, I don't know. But what I do know is that I'm becoming more of an introvert everyday. And I'm not upset about it.

Don't get me wrong; I have made some wonderful friends here. The people in the theatre department are great, and many of them care about me in a way I don't deserve. But I still value my time to myself. I enjoy sitting in my room, writing in my journal, reading a book, watching TV...just unwinding from the day's events. 

I just need you all to understand that it's nothing personal. If you invite me to do something and I say no, it's not because I don't like you. It's not because I don't enjoy being around you. Because I do! But at the end of the day, I reenergize by being alone. I've spent my entire day with people around me, and I just really need to be silent. 

Please don't hate me for it. Please don't cut me out of your life or your friend group. And please don't make me feel guilty for not being as sociable as you are. I may not be there every time you hang out, but I will be there sometimes....and I want to know that I'm still welcome every once in a while. So keep inviting me. I promise I'll take you up on it one day.

This is new territory for me. I'm learning how to handle it appropriately. Be patient. 

Sincerely,

An Introvert That Still Wants To Be Friends 

Week #6: I'm Right Where I Need To Be.

My 2016

Week #6

I'm Right Where I Need To Be.

So, I admit that this picture is rather random, and doesn't have anything to do with my post. I took it last night at our One Day Only event, a ten minute play festival that a lot of our department was involved in. I went to see it and tried to take pictures, and this is one of my favorites...probably because it reminds me of how I feel about life on a daily basis. Give me my Snuggie, junk food and a Netflix show, and I'm set. Anyway.

The past week hasn't really felt like a full week. I came back from Mardi Gras break and realized that there's only 2 weeks left in Winter Quarter. I'm feeling pretty good about everything, though, because all of my major assignments are either done or nearly there. I'm in a good place, which relieves a TON of stress.

Most of you know by now that my adventure at Louisiana Tech has been far more challenging than I ever thought it would be. I don't necessarily mean this in a bad way; grad school is supposed to be difficult. But a lot of various elements have combined to create a tough situation for me, and while I have insanely good days, there are also insanely awful ones. I often have to remind myself that this will all be worth it in the end.

It's funny how things happen, though. Lately I've been feeling especially frustrated, for a variety of reasons. But one day last week I was in my professor's office, discussing a bunch of things, and he randomly said something to me that completely changed my attitude about everything. He said,

"Alexis, I want you to know that you should be proud of all you've done since coming here. You got here in the fall, and you jumped right into everything. I'm sure it's been rough, and probably still is at times, but you've done great work. I say this selfishly, but I have no doubt that you're right where you need to be, and when you graduate you will be more than ready to work in theatre--and do extremely well."

He meant it to be encouraging (which it SO was), but it also made me realize that Tech is exactly where I am supposed to be. It's a part of human nature to wonder if we've made the right choice, to question how we ended up at one place and not another, to ask ourselves what would be different if we hadn't made this decision. But I'm through wondering that. Louisiana Tech is preparing me for the career I have dreamt about, and I no longer doubt that I will be well-equipped and beyond ready to tackle whatever comes my way. 

And that is so incredibly reassuring, folks. You have no idea.

So here's to another week, my readers. May you find confirmation in your lives; may you know without a doubt that you are exactly where you need to be, and may you begin to shine and excel at whatever is placed in front of you. 

There's no greater feeling than knowing you're in the right place. 

Week #5: Reunions Heal Your Heart.

My 2016

Week #5

Reunions Heal Your Heart. 

This week was kind of a mixture of things. I spent the first half in school, basking in the glow of no rehearsal and free evenings to do what I wanted/needed to do, which was glorious. 

On Thursday I drove to Dayton, TN to spend my Mardi Gras break with my college roommate and best friend Emilie. Because she still works at our alma mater (Bryan College), I also had the opportunity to visit with old professors and friends that were still in school there. Bryan's theatre department had their winter show this week, so I was able to watch my theatre friends perform as well.

On Friday night, we had a surprise birthday party for my dear friend Drew (pictured above). He has literally become one of the most wonderful, amazing, loyal and steadfast friends I have ever had. I can't imagine him not being in my life.

On Saturday, I got to help my former theatre professor build a set for the upcoming opera performance. It was so much fun to show him how much I've learned since being at Tech, and for him to see that I'm growing into a true artist, able to do well in my craft and excel at what I love.

Today, Emilie and I had a long conversation over Sonic Happy Hour with Caleb Julin, a senior at Bryan. He was a freshman when I graduated, and I have loved watching his college experience from afar and to see the man he has become over the last 3 years. It was so wonderful to catch up with him and to not only laugh hysterically, but to also have a serious, thought-provoking conversation. 

Right now, at this very moment, I'm sitting on the couch watching Frasier with my best friend while she eats Taco Bell and we just enjoy being together. I don't know where life is going to take her in the next few months. I find myself selfishly hoping that she comes to Tech as well, but wherever she goes, I know we'll never stop being inseparable.

And that brings me to my main point of this post. On Friday, something happened that made me think back on friendships I have had over the years. I realized when I arrived that I had told basically no one that I was coming to visit...which is unusual for me. Drew came up to me and said, "I can't believe you didn't tell me you were coming!" I said, "I am so sorry, I completely forgot and I feel terrible." His response was:

"Lex, I am confident enough in our relationship to know that if you are in town, you will find me at some point. We WILL see each other, no matter what. It's how we work. I know you care about me."

It was a normal response, but it made me think. God has blessed me so richly with friends that are tried and true, unwavering and faithful, even though we live hundreds of miles apart and hardly ever see each other. 

God is so good to me. Friendship is a beautiful thing, and I'm so glad I have the opportunity for reunions that heal my heart and refresh my spirit. 

That's really all I have to say, readers. I realize it's not profound or deep or inspiring. But it's what my week has been for me.

Here's to a brand new week: May you be reminded of the people placed in your life for you to cherish, to love and to appreciate. They are beyond priceless.

 Hold them close and love them well. I know I will.