Week #30: Oh, How He Loves.

My 2016

Week #30

Oh, How He Loves.

Love has turned into such a cliché. We shy away from talking about it because we think it makes us appear weak, overly sensitive or out of touch with reality. I'm just as guilty of it; so often I cover up my love of love for fear of being too girly, of being a stereotypical love-crazed female. For some reason, I think that brushing aside the concept of love will make me look more stable or better equipped to succeed in life. Love, who needs it? It's not all it's cracked up to be.

Except it is.

Over the last few days, I've felt that the concept of love--specifically God's love for me--has been thrown in my face at every possible turn. It's funny how God will plant a thought in your mind, and then that thought will continue to be woven into your life until you finally get the hint and work through the kinks. That's been my life lately. In church this morning, the sermon was about finances....but every lyric of music that I heard throughout the entire service was about love. His love. His love for us. His love for me.

Oh, how He loves.

Such a basic concept. Something we're taught from day one of children's church. We say the phrase "Jesus loves me" without even thinking about the incredible weight that sentence holds. 

He. Loves. Us. 

The other day, I was talking to someone, and I made the offhand remark that I love who I am. I like to think of myself as a confident, strong, self-assured woman. I like to imagine that I have a pretty firm grasp on who I am and who I want to be. But that's not entirely true.

Sometimes I remember who I have been in the past; When I do, the mistakes I've made and the weight of my regret makes my heart so heavy that I often can't breathe. That's hardly the portrait of strength and confidence I prefer to emulate. 

So...maybe I don't love who I am. Maybe, instead, I love who His love has made me. I'm still a jumbled-up mess of heartache, "if onlys" and a longing for second chances...

But regardless, He has taken my mistakes and turned them into lessons I needed to learn. 

He has taken my regrets and turned them into reasons for thankfulness. 

He has taken my sorrow and turned it into contentment. 

And He does this, all of this, because He loves me. 

Oh, how He loves.

I mean, really. The God of the universe, the Creator of everything, chooses to love me; a pathetic, shallow, empty shell of a woman who can't go five minutes without royally screwing up. 

How do we so easily forget something so terribly overwhelming?

My friend Michael sang the song "How He Loves" this morning, and the words from it have been mulling around in my mind for the past few days. It doesn't matter how many times I hear it, there's a certain part of the song that always brings tears to my eyes. 

We are His portion and He is our prize

Drawn to redemption by the grace in His eyes

If His grace is an ocean, we're all sinking.

And heaven meets earth like an unforeseen kiss

And my heart turns violently inside of my chest

And I don't have time to maintain these regrets

When I think about the way

That He loves us.

The last sentence, though. 

I don't have time to maintain these regrets.

I don't have time to regret the teenage years of rebellion and angst towards my parents.

I don't have time to regret an addiction that has plagued me throughout high school, college and will always be a constant struggle in my adult life.

I don't have time to regret countless broken relationships, the loss of which I mourn on a daily basis and long for a chance to make things right.

I don't have time to regret the insincerity I too easily produce in my dealings with others.

I don't have time to regret the selfishness I battle in pursuit of my own ambition.

I don't have time to regret the distance and apathy I so often experience in my faith.

I don't have time to maintain these regrets because...

He loved me before these.

He loves me through these.

He loves me because of these.

He loves me in spite of these.

Oh, how He loves.

My prayer for you, dear readers, is that you will be reminded and, consequently, overwhelmed at the deep, deep love of Jesus today. May He find a way to show you that you are His beloved, regardless of your past. He loves you. 

Oh, how He loves.